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Fuck You Microsoft, I Will Install the Cisco VPN Client on Windows 10 and Furthermore, You Can Suck It

Seriously man, fuck Microsoft, fuck Windows 10, and fuck you. No actually you are ok, as long as you don’t work for Microsoft or are some sort of freak MS enthusiast, but what kind of shithole stasi big brother state do we live in when your software vendor tells you what applications you can and can’t install on the operating system you purchased for your own PC? I mean I know they’ve been doing that shit for a long time, but tonight the stars revolt (seemingly misplaced Powerman 5000 reference).

I just had the joy of wasting an hour of my life getting the damn Cisco VPN client to work. When Windows 8 came out, there were a few workarounds to have to do, but now MS has stepped up their game of being total assclowns and won’t let you even run the installer. In your delight, you will receive the pleasantly authoritarian popup box that says, “This app can’t be run on this PC“. Fan-fucking-tastic.
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Remote Desktop Server – Registry Key to Change RDP Listening Port

As you probably already know, by default, Microsoft Remote Desktop listens on port 3389. This is all good, but what if you are behind a firewall and wanted to allow port forwarding to be able to access multiple computers via RDP remotely but can’t because they are all running on the same port?

Well, if you’re crafty and have a decent Linux-based router like Mikrotik that will let you create packet mangling rules to change the destination port number, you can get around this, but in environments where you have little SOHO routers like Linksys or Belkin, typically this is where changing the port number that RDP listens on comes in handy. The only problem then is remembering whatever port you changed it to because then you have to specify it anytime you connect via RDP which can be a pain if you’ve got a bad memory. There are already a thousand and one articles out there to help you change the port number, this is a quick post for future reference for myself.
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Adtran Total Access TA924 – SIP Configuration for Asterisk

Here is a scrubbed working configuration for an Adtran TA924 SIP connection to an Asterisk server with a couple of noteworthy points:

  • The internal feature codes of the Adtran have been disabled with the “voice feature-mode network” command. As long as your Adtran’s internal dialplan supports it, feature codes can be passed through to Asterisk.
  • With the “accept $ cost 0” statement on the “NETWORK” trunk group, the Adtran dialplan simply passes off all traffic to the network.
  • Three way calling has been disabled with the “voice call-appearance-mode single” command.
  • Call waiting has been disabled with the “no call-waiting” command per SIP registration.
  • G711u is the only codec enabled by choice.
  • There is an example of how to connect an FXS port to a SIP user.
  • There is an example of how to set transmit/receive gains on an FXS port.
  • There is an example of how to register an extension range of 7000-7023 to an Asterisk server.

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Polycom RealPresence Desktop – Windows QoS Registry Settings

Last week, I had to call Polycom support for two issues. One of which I mentioned in another post (Automatic Gain Control issue) and the other was because I wanted to find out why their user manual showed some QoS settings that my version did not have access to.

After waiting on hold for ten minutes, the first tech support person I reached was a little cocky, arrogant, smart ass of a prick who was less than helpful with either of my support requests. At one point, he literally told me “we can’t control Windows” (which brings up the question, “Well why in the fuck did Polycom even make software in the first place then?”) in regards to my AGC issue even after I told him that I had disabled all of the Windows settings that take control of the audio interface. He also said that you can set up QoS in Windows “somewhere in the network settings” (which turned out to be completely erroneous) without giving an ounce of help or direction.

Towards the end of our call, he was just trying to get me off the phone basically with an answer of “you’re fucked” to all my questions. At that point, I got pissed off and demanded to speak to somebody else. Finally, I got put on the phone with one of their product engineers and they actually addressed my issues. Long story short, the engineer ended up having to do a remote support session and did indeed acknowledge my AGC issue and gave me an explanation of why I couldn’t see the QoS settings mentioned in the manual. It turns out, those settings only show up if you use their provisioning server and they don’t even set the QoS settings in Windows like I needed.
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Cisco SPA500S Excel Sidecar Template

Here is an Excel spreadsheet I found somewhere on the internet and modified to be the exact dimensions for the Cisco SPA500S sidecar (aka the Attendant Console) that works with any of the SPA 5xxG series of IP phones. I’ve even added extra columns to be able to add an extension and a description if you want for each line key button, which is perfect for a call center type environment. All you have to do is fill out the line keys you want on the template, print it out on any 8.5×11 sheet of paper (or any size paper that will fit the cells for that matter), then brush up on your kindergarten cutting skills and you’re in business. Enjoy!
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Windows 8.1 – Disable IPv6 Components

While trying to troubleshoot some issues with a user’s flaky VPN connection (they could get connected but couldn’t ping anything on the company network), my first guesses were that it was either a routing issue and that IPv6 might be the culprit or that it could be an MTU issue. In searching for the answers on how to disable IPv6, I had stumbled across a blog article that, while seemingly helpful at the time, had some misleading information on it that caused some rather undesirable results. It gave me an incorrect registry value setting of “0xffffffff” that actually caused Windows to take an extra five seconds to boot.
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Windows Update Error 8024402C – Bypass WSUS for VPN Computers Joined to the Domain

For remote teleworkers who have computers joined to a domain running Windows Server Update Services (WSUS), to overcome Windows Update error 8024402C, via the registry, you will need to force the computer to bypass your WSUS server by setting the “UseWUServer” DWORD value from “1” to “0” and then restart the computer.
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Mikrotik Scripting – Array Push Function

Since the scripting language at the moment on Router OS version 6.13 is lacking in the array editing department, here is a simple array push function I created.

# Usage: [$arrayPush <$array name> <value> <key position to place value (0-n or -1)>]
# Input an array name, value, and the key position to push the value to. To push value to the end of the array, enter -1.
# If array doesn't already exist, you must declare the variable and set it to "" before calling the function.
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Mikrotik Scripting – Function to Split an IP Address into an Array

If you are unfamiliar with Mikrotik networking equipment, do yourself a favor and check them out at mikrotik.com or routerboard.com. Mikrotik uses Router OS, a Linux based operating system. In my eyes, they are every bit as comparable to Cisco at a fraction of the price with an impressive and robust GUI. I’ve been using them in production environments for six years with outstanding results. What other networking equipment has it’s own scripting language? None that I know of. The CCR series of routers with up to 36 processor cores are unparalleled in performance and flexibility.
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